Pimp Hand Shenanigans
by SeptemberRaven
Summary: "Do you really think you can out-pimp me, the Demon Lord of pimp?" Link remained strong and determined. "I know I can," he said with conviction. Ghirahim narrowed his eyes, leaning down slightly, "Prove it."


Link grunted, roughly jerking his sword back out of the white hand that held it in its grasp. He slashed forward at his foe but the silver-haired, self-proclaimed demon lord jumped back to avoid it. He gnashed his teeth together – this was beyond frustrating!

He ran at him again, swinging his sword wildly and hoping it wouldn't be halted in mid-air again, only he was met with diamond shards this time.

Something connected solidly with his cheek and he stumbled back, turning to see the demon strutting towards him with a smirk on his face. He received another harsh smack – that had to be at least the seventeenth time now! Before the young hero could recover, the one known as Ghirahim, whom he had only met not five minutes ago, backhanded him yet again.

"Gah!" he yelled, clutching a hand to his face where there would certainly be a handprint later, "Why do you keep slapping me?" He shot a glare at the white-clad demon. He'd been the victim of this Ghirahim-person's condescending torment since the start of their little duel, and frankly, he was already sick of it.

He cried out as he was struck again, this time with so much force he was sent flying towards the far wall, cracking his head against the stone.

"Quit it!" he shot back angrily, receiving an infuriating chuckle in response.

"You have to keep your pimp-hand strong, sky fool." Ghirahim grinned, lightly hitting the back of his right hand in his left palm.

Link blew his bangs out of his face with a huff, placing both palms firmly on the wall and pushing off, sheathing his sword and marching towards the demon with purpose. Two could play at this game. He stopped right in front of Ghirahim, the demon cocking an eyebrow in question, which soon turned to amusement when Link raised his right hand up beside him, palm turned inward.

The demon scoffed, placing a hand on his hip in a sassy way, "Do you really think you can out-pimp me, the Demon Lord of pimp?" he flipped his hair.

Link remained strong and determined. "I know I can," he said with conviction.

Ghirahim narrowed his eyes, leaning down slightly, "Prove it."

He wasn't worried; there was no way this weak _human_ child could even lay a small bruise on him! After all, he was Pimp Lord Ghirahim, resident bad-ass of the Surface. No one could stand up to him. No one could…

The impact was equivalent to eleven atomic bombs going off. At the same time.

Ghirahim crashed through the Skyview Temple, shot through the Faron Woods, past Skyloft, into space, circled around Mars, flew into the sun, flew out of the sun, burst into Majora's Moon, killed Tingle, rocketed across the Great Sea and into the Forsaken Fortress, destroyed Ganon's castle, flew into Death Mountain and past Lon Lon Ranch before he finally came to a stop in the Twilight Realm, reeling and severally disoriented, having lost at least a trillion brain cells from the trip. But he was a sexy ass demon so he had at least seven billion left.

Back in the Skyview Temple boss room Link stared at his hand in shock, and then at the ginormous hole he'd made in the temple and in the space time continuum. All with one slap.

He whistled slowly in awe, "Wow, I did _not_ know I could do_ that."_

A small blue light flashed from behind him, Fi flipped from her vessel.

"Master Link, I have detected abnormally high ratings of pimp emitting from your right hand, these ratings must be kept in constant maintenance should the pimpage build up too much." She informed in her auto-tuned voice and dipped her head slightly, "In short, Master, keep your pimp hand strong."

Link nodded, clenching his fist. With his pimp hand nothing could stand in his way. Now, it was time to rescue Zelda… and maybe hit Denny's (not literally) while he was at it.

Several games over, Ghirahim groaned and rubbed his forehead, sporting a monstrous headache and possibly fatal head trauma. He raised his head and looked at the catastrophic trail left in his wake. Despite his current position, he couldn't help but nod his head slowly in approval. He knew when he'd been beaten, and epically at that.

"Keep your pimp hand strong, sky– no, Link." He corrected himself, "Keep your pimp hand strong."

* * *

**Sorry, I had to. Ghirahim slaps you so much in the first battle. xD**

**Welp, that was my daily dose of stupidity for today.**

**By the way, to the people reading Merciless, I'm working on it. Just trying to plan out the rest before I write anything more but I have about 50 percent of the next chapter done so yeeeeah -w-**

**Hey *nudge nudge* hey, guys *nudge* review, please? :3 *brick'd***


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